I've been extremely irritable, short tempered, and just no fun. This is soooooo not me. I was starting to think I was going through the change (I AM ALMOST 40) Thinking maybe it was time for some pills of some sort.
It's really not normal for me to be short or rude. I'm embarrassed to say that's been me for the last week or so. Here's a great example. I'm not sure if I've told you that at the school district I work for I'm a driver supervisor. So, I get the opportunity to work with all kinds of personalitys. That's part of what I love about my job. Lately there's a gentleman, let's call him Dave, that's decided it's a good idea to come visit me every afternoon to discuss his route. It's never a short visit taking at least 20 mins for me to hear about the whole afternoon run. On one of these afternoons I walked in and gave my best not today attitudes to Dave. He didn't notice, instead he followed me into my office and began he's story. There was squealing, giggles, and several different sound effects from the afternoon run. My head was pounding and I honestly couldn't take it anymore. I looked up at him and said "Dave the sound of your voice is bugging the hell outta me! Would you please leave my office???", he did not. Instead he began telling me how awful he'd felt the previous week and if I'd like to know what he'd taken that helped.
I don't remember much about what he said after this. I was mortified, still am to be honest, this is not who I am. Talking to someone like that is so beyond my normal personality.
My actions at home must have been very similar because my husband made me an appointment with our family doctor. I believe he was thinking I must be going through the change but wouldn't dare say it. It's like he was afraid to say the words.
I'm not sure why!!! Lol. 😜 Regardless I went. You see I don't really like myself right now. The manner in which I've been behaving is so not me. I feel like I'm losing it, kinda like its not me at all. I'm mad at the world, tired, and easily annoyed!!!!
Doctors visit reviled that Apparently, I'm not going through the change, but I am sick. 2 ear infections, bronchitis, and a stomach bug. I've been given 3 days off work and told to rest. She said my moods are more than likely due to my illness and me not dealing with being sick. Meds were prescribed and I've been told I should be better within the week.
It's pretty sad when you can't stand yourself. An apology was sent to Dave, and he graciously said he knew I wasn't feeling well. Feeling super guilt though, as it's embarrassing knowing that I let myself go there. I'll never let myself act that way again.
Tomorrow is the last day of work before spring break starts and I'm sure we'll be shorthanded. I hate that I won't be there to help but I do know for sure that this break is welcomed!!!
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